Inspiration

Every day I struggle to find inspiration. I struggle to find the will to get up each night for work. I struggle to find the will to get out of my warm car into the cold morning air when I get home from work. I struggle to find the will to pause my audio books. I struggle to find reasons in why I can't just do what I need to do to be better. I have skated by on a whim and a prayer all too often. Almost two years ago now, I finished a book that changed my life. Going in to this book I was expecting heartbreak, devastation, and very little faith in the community I live in. I experienced all of those things. The major thing I was not expecting was for this book to impact me in such a way that I finally figured out who I need to become.
I was so wrapped up in this book, that I needed to tell every person I cared about how much it meant to me. When I get so involved in something it is hard for me to tell people what is going on in my head. I tried telling my Wife what this book meant for me and she of course was understanding and very kind. I of course told her of my struggles and she knew just how triggering this book could have been. I could not fully articulate to her what it was that I needed to say. Although, its terribly difficult for me to describe books to her. I always end up telling her she just needs to read it. I then moved on to my Mom, she is always my go-to after Annie. I saw my mom and began to explain to her how powerful this book was for me and she expressed interest in reading it. So of course I loaned it to her. When my Mom finished this book we met back up to talk about it. She told me something she was prompted to do while reading this book. When she told me what she had done, I was finally struck with some inspiration.
When I was simply surviving every day at my darkest moments there were two people who always gave me a glimmer of hope. Those people were teachers. Supportive teachers save lives. I saw a picture while doing some endless scrolling on some sort of social media. The caption for this picture was "Become the person YOU needed." That hit a nerve. I know now with certainty of what I need to do with my life. While I still struggle to find the inspiration I need to go about doing it; I know that without a doubt I need to be that glimmer of hope for a teenager that is struggling like I was.
So here it is! I want to work in education. In order to work in education, I need to get an education. So here begins the hardest part. Holding myself accountable, and doing the work that needs to be done. Join me on the journey friends. We're on it for the long haul.
What sort of inspiration do you need? Is there something I can do to help you find it? Is there an every day task you struggle to find the will to do? Mine is definitely folding the laundry.